Not Only Skin Deep

Tarana had a fantastic six day beach vacation with my parents last week. She rolled around the water in a big, clear, plastic beach ball, went on a dolphin sightseeing boat, collected seashells, swam in the ocean, made sandcastles, played at a water park, and threw a few tantrums. She also decided she DOES NOT like to eat shrimp. Weirdo :)

When I met my parents to pick her up, she strolled into the restaurant beaming, browner than ever, wearing her shades, and said "rawr," with her dino claws in the air, acting out a "surprise" appearance. I hugged her and she started chattering away about her trip. The first thing she told me was that she saw dolphins at the beach and asked if I remembered when we saw dolphins at the aquarium one day when "I sad, but you and dad happy." Oh yes, I remember.

The second thing she told me, pointing to her cheeks, was, "Mom, look my face. Spots." Yep. She had sun pimples. Or something like that. And she was concerned. My newly adopted, six or seven-year-old Indian child is concerned about her pimples. I love that she turns to me for beauty solutions. She has mentioned her beauty concerns before. She is worried about other blemishes on her skin, too. She is fascinated by my morning and evening beauty routines, and often asks me to put some makeup on HER face, too. When she got home from the beach, I taught her how to wash her face, and now she proudly washes every night!

I have always been self-conscious about the blemishes on my face, too. I have tried so many products to clear up my skin! But nothing really works. And this really didn't matter until now, when I have my daughter's self-esteem to look after as well as my own. So I decided to try something new.

Because our finances have been so tight with our job transitions, and because I would love to have extra funds available to donate to other families' adoptions, I decided to become a consultant for Rodan and Fields, the dermatologists who created Proactive. These doctors have expanded their product line to include treatments for anti-aging, eczema, psoriasis, scars, dark spots, etc! I can't wait to use these products to help Tarana become more confident in her appearance!

For the months of June and July, I am donating fifty percent of my Rodan + Fields commission to friends who are in the beginning stages of their adoption! We have been so blessed by the generosity of God's people helping us in our adoption. Now, we want to be the ones to bless others in their adoption journey!

I'm so excited! And so nervous! I'm not a salesperson AT ALL! And I would never sell something I didn't believe to be useful and high-quality. So I'm trusting God to bless this business. After all, "unless the Lord builds the house, the builders labor in vain." (Psalm 127:1). I hope my investment in this business will not be in vain. I hope this will be an avenue of the Lord's provision for our family's financial needs and for the financial needs of other adoptive families. I also hope to find customers and teammates who will experience success with these products and feel more confident and beautiful!

End shameless plug.

In other news, please pray for us, specifically for a peaceful, on-schedule bedtime routine. Transitions are hard. Thank you for praying.

Business Links:
Fundraiser Facebook Page
My Rodan and Fields Business page

Lord, have mercy.

All the adoption training books and advisors say that newly adopted children should not be immediately subjected to the hectic schedules of their new families. That is exactly right. But that's not how it is with us, and so our house is out. of. control.

Ideally, I would be a stay-at-home mom. My husband would come home from work at the same time every night, and I would have supper ready so we could all eat together as a family. Tarana would have a set schedule. She would know what time to expect meals. She would know when we all wake up, who leaves the house when, what time we take a shower, and bedtime would be at the same time each and every night. There would be no meltdowns.

That's not gonna happen any time soon. I have been working irregular hours, and Kyle has been a stay-at-home dad most of the time. We did get her a calendar with photos to show what to expect each day, and that has helped some, but still. Oh. my. goodness. gracious.

This week, Kyle started going to school full time (PRAISE THE LORD FOR THE G.I. BILL), and Tarana started going to summer day camp (PRAISE THE LORD FOR OUR CHURCH). My work hours are still sporadic, and everyone is more exhausted at the end of the day. And the dishes are piled up in the sink. And there are toys strewn everywhere. And sometimes the dogs have to remind us about their meals. Chaos.

Evenings have been hard. Mornings have been hard. Kicking. Screaming. Thrashing. Arguing.
Lord, have mercy. Tarana is trying to show us that she needs a predictable schedule and much more of our attention. The more comfortable she becomes with us, the more she expresses her totally understandable outrage at being thrown into this new life full of uncertainties.

I know. I'm complaining. I'm sorry. And I know that none of these circumstances are surprising to God. He knew all about this before she came home. He knew I would be starting a crazy new job at almost the exact time that we got the call to go to India. This job has been God's provision for our family, and I am thankful. I am. Like it or not, we do need to earn money to buy food and shelter and our American lifestyle. God knows all of that. He's not surprised by any of this, and we are in the palm of His hands. And I trust Him. But it's hard.

Even still, going into this adoption, we knew it would be hard. We are just happy she's not running with knives. Yet. We are thankful for Tarana. She is perfect for us. And everything would be better if only we could have the ideal, predictably scheduled life we have dreamed of. Does anything ever work out exactly the way we plan? No. Because God's plan is always better than ours. There is a reason for every little detail. Every little inconvenience. Every little circumstance.

So what do you do when you've had all the best advice in the world, but you can't follow it because you don't have the time or resources? You pray. And you cry. And you reach out to your friends. Thank GOD for our community of supportive friends.

Happily, Tarana is often willing to discuss her feelings. She is so funny about the work situation. We tell her I have to work for money so we can buy food, so she points out all the cups of coins we have around the house and says we have plenty of money. She says if I don't like work, I should go to school with her and play like everybody else. She is sweet and considerate. And oh, is she ever passionate about EVERYTHING.

And soon, I will be finished with this sporadic job. I will have some summer time with my sweet girl, and then I will start working a more predictable job as a teacher at a new school. I will also be running a new home business with Rodan + Fields. And Kyle is loving school so far, which makes me everso happy. So the future is promising. And everything is going to be perfect. And there will be no more tantrums, ever. Right? A girl can dream.

 

the princess and the bear



Last week, Tarana accidentally left the door open, and our old, fat, yellow, completely necessary and beloved dog, Opus, snuck out of the house in search of adventure.

Tarana says (and demonstrates) that he must have sneakily tip-toed behind the couch as she and Kyle were watching TV. What a stinker, right?!

Kyle ran all around the neighborhood searching for Opus. We were so worried. I was at work, so all I could do was post a frantic facebook status. Minutes later, my cousin did an internet search and found Opus' photo on our city's local list of recently impounded animals. By that time, the pound had already scanned Opus for his microchip and called Kyle. Thank goodness the city made us get that microchip against our will!

Well, Tarana is very fond of Opus. When Kyle told her they would be able to get Opus out of "jail" the next day, she said she wanted him to stay there. She was adamant with both of us that she would not be going to get Opus out of jail. She obviously felt that her loyal friend, a dear loved one, had abandoned her, as she has been abandoned by others before. She was angry!

So I told her a story. Clearly, there must have been a bad bear roaming the neighborhood, threatening our family. The bear must have tried to come in our house, and Opus had to run it off. Opus succeeded in protecting our family, because we never did see that bear, but not without a fight. Unfortunately, a police officer drove by and saw the epic battle between that bad bear and our beloved Opus. And so both animals were arrested and taken to jail. It was just a misunderstanding. Since both animals were fighting, the police thought they were both bad.

Poor Opus, taking the fall for protecting our family.

Tarana was skeptical at first, but now this is the official story of Opus' having to spend a night away from home.

When she and Kyle went to bail Opus out the next day, Opus was thrilled to see them.

Walking out of the pound, Tarana looked at Kyle and said, "Where bear? Oh yeh. In jail." She's a believer, y'all.

After Opus was home, and when I came home from work, Tarana greeted me, enthusiastically waving this photo in her hand. "Look, mom!," she said. "Your princess and your bear!" This is because she knows how often we refer to Opus as our protector bear, and we always tell her that she is our precious, beautiful princess. Later, Tarana wanted to display the photo in the house. She taped it up on the map in my bedroom, right below India. She told Kyle she wanted it "on the wall so mom can see every morning." She knows I love her. And she knows how much time I spend looking at that map!

So my friends, I stand beside one of my favorite quotes, which says, "Fairy tales do not tell children the dragons exist. Children already know that dragons exist. Fairy tales tell children the dragons can be killed."

Fairy tales are absolutely necessary. I will, therefore, make up fairy tales to explain anything and everything until the day I die. :)