Seeds of Love

 

This child is amazing.

Now that I've been working from home, we've made a few changes in our daily routines, and life has been so much better for all of us. T is more affectionate, more attached, less anxious, and so are we.

She had her first swimming lesson yesterday. In India, she swam in the river where her biological parents washed clothes. When I first suggested we go swimming, she wrinkled up her nose in disgust and said water is dirty and the fish will bite her feet. She was surprised and delighted the first time she saw a swimming pool with clean, clear water. Her apprehension quickly disappeared when she saw the splash fountains in a local pool. Now, she is confident and gleeful in the water. Maybe overly confident. She doesn't believe in drowning. So swim lessons it is. The best part of watching that lesson was how often she looked to me and my husband for approval each time she tried a new skill with my friend, her teacher.

Her favorite songs lately have come from the Muppet Movie and Vacation Bible School. She sings passionately, "Am I a mupppppeeet...or am I a man?" I'm thinking this will help her deal with any possible future identity crises. Hah. And her favorite song from VBS is the Seeds of Praise song, "Mighty to Save." She walks around
singing the words, "Zephaniah 3:17" over and over.

I'll admit, it wasn't easy to get her in the car for VBS every day this week. She seems to have more social anxiety since she's realized how her English skills compare to those of her peers. Happily, once she arrived at VBS each day, she had a blast, and proudly shows off the crafts she made there. In the car on the way home after one object lesson on building your house on a firm foundation, she pointed out to me that many buildings, including our house, were made of brick and therefore not likely to blow away. Then she got that lesson mixed up with The Three Little Pigs and started explaining that brick (she calls them rock) houses won't be easily blown down by bad wolves.

In the morning, she wants me to help her choose her clothes, and she wants to help choose mine. She complains that I wear the same things over and over again. She loves to play with my hair, putting it up in "levers" to make ponytails and pigtails.

She clung to me in public for the first time today, in the pet store as we waited for the clerk to give us advice on our three aquatic frogs. When I told her I was going to find a clerk to help us, she said, "Why, mom? I can help you!" Oh, I love her. Love her. Love her.

She loves our dogs. She had learned to use the word cuddle, and mostly in relation to cuddling with the dogs. She often speaks of her love for the dogs, though she's not yet comfortable using the "L" word with us yet. Completely understandable. She loves catching fireflies. She loves blowing bubbles. She loves drawing on the sidewalk with chalk.

It's not always easy, of course. The creation of this family over the past four months has been challenging for all three of us, as is normal and expected with adoption and all other feats of parenting.

I just read in another blog today, "The only way to care for the disadvantaged – is to disadvantage yourself –which is guaranteed to turn out for your advantage."

It's true. Love is a choice. This is what we signed up for. And it's exhausting and frustrating and stressful, but more than that, it's beautiful. T has changed our lives for good.